I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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