did you get engaged???
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
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