i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
