if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
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