yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize
