R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
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