Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
