if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
