I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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