Kareoke will never be a sober sport
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
