I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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