when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
He is an equal opportunity slut.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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