Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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