Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
