I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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