Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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