Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
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