People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
