dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
