one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
