What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
