you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
