I am in a vortex of obligation.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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