How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
