Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
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