She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize