You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
