omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
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