Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Randomize
