on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
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