I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
There was a lot of him and a little penis
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
