The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
one might say we're banned from that church
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
