I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
