Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
