just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
