i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize