I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
