A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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