Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
She has the best kind of daddy issues
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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