matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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