"it" just moved
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
