ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
I love you.
Bad choice
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
