Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
