He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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