Your tits are I can't wait for
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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