Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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