you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
