i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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