We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
