I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
Hahaha April fools!
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
25 Adults Reveal The Most Embarrassing Stories From When They Were Kids
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵