oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
