Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
did i just pee glitter
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Randomize
